感谢主！上月考的第三门CPA过了，刚查到分数，不早不晚正好感恩节前的讯息。开心:)

周日听到这样一个例子，关于感恩。一人被抢劫了，

He said, Thanks God that he only robbed my wallet, but didn't hurt me.

Then he said, Thanks God that even though my wallet was gone, it was not that much.

Then he said, Thanks God that I'm the one who got robbed but not the one who robbed me.

最后一句非常贴切，不是吗？凡事感恩，这是最近发生的一些事情中更加学到的。最近在操练一种与上帝的默契，凡事出言谨慎，宁愿沉默不愿反唇相讥。发现上帝给予的安慰和满足很强大，很足够。记得小布什的自传看的让我很感动，以基督徒看基督徒的角度了解了这位美国前总统。其中他说帮父亲老布什当总统宣传的时候，自己可以激昂的对不利父亲的中伤予以还击，因为他是在为父亲做事。但自己当总统的时候，他选择默默接收来自各方各种各样的箭，然后交给上帝评论。我想他当时的心态应该是：感谢上帝我是受伤者，不是伤害我的人。

 

关于朋友守信的问题，还是没有解决，一切仍在祷告中。

 

give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. (1 Thessalonians 5:18)

好书推荐-The Reason  for God, by Timothy Keller

凡说到信仰，大家都很谨慎沉默，完全能够理解。从小我们就谈人生目标，长大了我们感慨人生的意义，真正到讨论到底意义何在的时候却因为种种因素我们自己麻醉自己，逃避不敢想的未来。如果能够愿意挑战自己的想法，找出一个合理的答案是否会更舒心安心些呢？不管怎样，自己要给自己一个明确的答案，这是对人生积极对自己负责的态度。一本纽约时报畅销书，易读，客观，逻辑性强，富有智慧的书，各位不如省下点闲暇浏览一下。尝试一下与作者的辩论和交流。

 

另外最近有件事弄得很纠结（我头一次用这时髦词，好像用对地方了）。关于守信的。朋友和朋友之间也是要守信的，是不是？明天决定讨一说法。

又看了一天的书，快吐了。凡是考试，我总是突击，实在有劳精力，加之年岁不容熬夜，学习时间有限，这么些东西够我啃的了。可是又想玩，想赶快考掉，于是有点打怵。晚上Ethan掌勺，他的意大利面酱总是做得很辣，今晚尤甚，我跟他开玩笑，莫不是想让我就此打消让他下厨的念头。。

Anyway, 上来嚷嚷下，给自己打打气，其他没什么。Ethan已经睡了，明早4点半就要爬起来在上班之前去教堂上Men's Fraternity Class. 每星期四一次没落，真为他骄傲。我也要奋斗！

昨晚给他熨衬衫，发现原来幸福就这么简单。

ok, 上来汇报一下近期安排，心中充满期待---

 

下周日马拉松，当然我跑不了26.2mile，不过要带Diana跑2mile，给她鼓起，所以下周考完以后要好好跑步。

下周六搬家，这一搬应该是至少要住上个五六年的，家具什么的都暂时不更新，也没什么想添置的东西，小家干净舒服就好。

下下周六For One Chicago, 四个教堂将派出千名志愿者在城市的各个街区做义工，明天去报名，很想刷房子阿，一定很有趣。

下下下周六一过就是生日了，哈哈，心里在开始盘算想吃什么中国菜。

下周三考完要跟姐妹们好好聚聚，昨晚用Netflix一连看了三集Prison Break, 嗯，movie night不错.

今天的天气还行，芝加哥开始转凉了，希望秋天的时间长一点，让我做好过冬的准备。

芝加哥申奥没成功，有点失望，第一轮就淘汰对总统也是个羞辱。对总统先生的演讲和前后的宣传表示失望，如果把一个体育盛事牵扯到政治目的，或者满足个人荣誉，要我是组委会成员我也不选芝加哥。。。谦卑乃真理也。

 

感恩于上帝，每一天都是那样充满希望。

Much prayer, much power; little prayer, little power; no prayer, no power. It's said by a faithful Christian after he got saved decades ago when he was 20 years old. Pastor Lutzer was mentioning this during the service today, and all I did hearing this was keeping nodding my head. It is true.

 

I can't believe how much Lord helped me through my life to think something serious which I deared not to think, to tear up the veil that I was hidden behind, to finally have the courage to admit my being unable, to have the full confidence in things I do. No matter what, I AM REDEEMED! I, a girl who thought she can handle every life challenges with perseverance and faith in herself, who sucessfully carried through burdens on her shoulder even with scars left, who thought the nicer she is the harder she works the more she deserves, was finally badly defeated by the presence of the Cross. The moment of her sitting in the church for the first time of her entire life, there was only tears. Later she realized how foolish she was to rely on herself whose strength only comes from an empty heart within. Something that really crushed her down was when she realized that even so much effort was paid to be a "decent nice person", yet she still owe the repentence to Jesus who died for her. Yes, for everyone and, for her. So she repented, she asked for help from God and stopped worshiping herself. Ever since then, there was another hope in her mind that she know she can't make it without God. So she started to pray. And for sure, it was a long journey and a challenged one.

 

But today I want to rejoicefully share that a prayer request that I had since the day I was saved, a prayer that cost me the most desperate tears and cries, the only prayer that I commited to pray for every single day since this year comes true. Lord has been very faithful to my prayer. He answered me exactly the way I asked for, from the very beginning. He searched us and found us, just like the shepherd found his sheep. Yes, here I am, with you sister. We are redeemed! Praise the Lord and He is powerful! Glory be with God! It only gives me more credits to my God, my Savior, my Redeemer!

 

I told Ethan today, Honey, I'm so happy to go to heaven with you. And hey you, you know that I want to meet you in the heaven too! I'm glad we will. Forever, we will be together.

又回到argo tea, 早早的走在Lincoln Park, 路上很静。今天是假日，一反平时周一时的忙碌，压根看不出这是一个如此热闹的街区。叫了一杯热Pom Tea一杯冰水, 坐在靠窗的那个位置，同样的位置，不同的风景，在这里看过严冬，暖冬，初春到暮春。一台电脑，一堆书，一杯茶，一杯冰水，一袋简易午餐。我的argo tea生活。窗外是自己走了近一年的小巷。虽不住在那个总是一股霉味的大楼了，可是一个个往往返返的日子还是依稀呈现。

 

最近尝试烧了些菜，Ethan都很喜欢；尝试做了几天housewife，不轻松却很幸福。每天的祷告，读圣经，同时做各自的devotion，这是我两年前从来不曾奢望的场景。而这一切却那么真实。困境中的磨炼，对自己的约束，亲情友情爱情的成长，一切一切归于主。

 

健康的生活，忙碌的作息，踏实的心态，坚定的信仰，这是我和我们家的追求。I love you Honey!

 

But be very careful to keep the commandment and the law that Moses the servant of the LORD gave you: to love the LORD your God, to walk in all his ways, to obey his commands, to hold fast to him and to serve him with all your heart and all your soul." - Joshua 22:5

ok, I came back from Mexico on Monday. Ethan and I went to a beach resort by carribean sea for a week. It was all-inclusive trip. Flight, transportation to hotel from airport, all kinds of mix drink or alcohol juice drink, great variety of buffet food selections with eight speical cuizines restaurants, whenever you want and whatever you want.... they even have bars by the beach and bars by the pool too while you can get drink staying in the pool. The service and food in resort was great. People comes to you to serve... and... tip is optional! the resort was big and have four big hotels. You can take a little train to travel between each hotel and enjoy different food or just different views. Also, the spa provides great facilities free, jacuzzie pool, sauna room and steam room. They charge like the price here in the States if you ask for massage, but it was great experience.

 

The view along the carribean sea was gorgeous. White sand, green water and blue sky...

 

I tried a lot of new things too. We did ATV, riding along the jungles. Ethan drove that before, so I sat behind him but I bet it will be for fun to drive. And I tried snorkling. I actually did snorkling in the Ocean and saw a sea turtle! A lot of fun water activities and it was just a great time of relax and rest!

 

I put some pictures of the wedding. Those are taken by mom who did a fantastic job. More will come as I get more pictures from our wedding photographer. The wedding went very well as many of friends were there witnessing my special day. I'm so happy that I got many friends from Salt as they volunteered to stay after the wedding to help cleaning up. My best maid of honor ever Katie, is such a blessing to me and she is so wonderful to help out on that day. I was so stressed out before the wedding through all the preparations. It's her who told me don't worry about anything and don't come out of your dressing room except pictures before the ceremony, I'll take care of everything. All you need to do is to enjoy it.  I'm blessed. I'm soo happy to meet Pingxing too! And her boyfriend PhiPhi. To have her as my bridemaid is an honor and a testimony of long-term friendship. I just feel bad that we can't talk more and spend more time privatly. Oh well, I wish we will have chance to meet each other soon.

 

Also, we took tons of pictures from our honeymoon. So it will take me a while to put them here.....Here is just a picture of the carribean sea we took during the trip of visiting the ancient Mexican ruins.

很久没更新了。因为总是忙忙碌碌，大大小小一桩桩的事，记事本上画满了勾勾叉叉，长长的to-do list上也开始一个个的标上Done。还有5天，单身的日子就结束了。七月中旬Katie把芝加哥的好姐妹们聚在一起给我办了个shower. 昨天跟未来的部分家族成员一年一度的聚会回来，叔叔阿姨，表兄弟，表姐妹，三十多个新面孔。Heather张罗着给我们办了个shower，又是一堆礼物，基本上camping的用品大体凑齐了，呵呵。未来两年内跟Ethan回国，他也是要被如此热情款待一番的。整个婚礼的准备过程，有措手不及的事，有歇斯底里的发泄，有开心的感动。Ethan前后也跟着忙忙碌碌，好欣慰，不至于让我像大多数新娘一样一个人忙活。不过，现在最想做的就是：休息，睡觉。。。所以很期待明天就是礼拜六，过了礼拜六我就再不用天天八小时回来还要想wedding planning，再不用满脑子的给这个发邮件给那个打电话然后再在网上订东西。。。有时候觉得挺傻，自己的婚礼爱咋整咋整呗，把自己弄得那么累干吗，抱着这样的态度我决定从现在开始，relax...

 

有时候忙到没能有空停下来想一想，就要嫁了，人生很大一变化啊！所以想到这，对未来充满希望和期待。

 

很久没动笔了，写东西没什么逻辑，各位见谅。

结婚之前的住所终于搞定了，了了一桩心事。房子七月底到期，然后要把东西都寄放在Ethan家，好在他的好心朋友跟我住一栋楼可以把房子腾给我住。上周末帮一个朋友搬家，今天兴致来了，虽然月底才搬，可自己也开始倒腾着装箱。想来在这间小破屋里已经呆了足足一年了，比在AZ的时间还长，这时间过得还真快啊。总调侃自己说住在难民所，一年来总有一种非常强烈的临时住所的感觉：厕所的浴池常年积水不通直道最近下狠心修好；墙壁发霉，除霉的东东已经把厕所部分墙壁弄得皱巴巴了；供暖是用电的害的我冬天有个月电费三位数，不得不大衣一件件往身上裹；厨房小的连切菜的地方都没有，只好把砧板半悬空放在水池和灶台边缘切菜；烤箱是需要拿着火柴伸到烤箱底部深处点着的，自从第一次用这烤箱作brownie弄到警报响以后再也没动过那危险的烤箱。可就这样一小破地方，我竟还能走路到密西根湖，透过厨房就能看到湖面，我竟还油盐酱醋的过了一年，竟还大大小小的箱子集满了几层架子，竟还生活装备一应俱全。婚礼各种采购全部聚集在家里，外加整理装箱的书和零碎东西，看着房间地上各个箱子瓶子家具勉强让出的一条不规则通道，才发现这一年，是满满的。

 

因为忙碌，有时候心情会有些自闭，不想去参加集体活动，不想折腾。事实证明，真正的我还是那个不能少朋友，跟朋友在一起开心一点就着的那个我。朋友不在多，在能说知心话且相互信任。我算幸运的。

 

MJ去世了，很突然。这世界上每分每秒都发生着非常突然的事，关键不是避免突然的发生，因为谁也阻止不了上帝的计划，而是避免突然事件之后的事。很多事，我们没法预料，某些事，我们却可以事先准备。

 

美国的独立日到了，自由这个概念在过去的两年里让我有了新的认识和感悟。

 

身边有很多精彩的故事，熟悉的不熟悉的。有时候向股冲击波，所谓的开眼界是不是就是如此呢？感谢神，一年半前在AZ一位长老的提醒下为离开AZ后找到适合自己的教堂祷告，神便给了我这样一个让我倍感像家一样的教堂和家人般的兄弟姐妹。神的爱，永不离弃。 

Ok, it all began from a tough day under the brutal summer weather. It's always been full-plan days since last weekend. Yes, I'm driving myself crazy on wedding plans. Constantly changing my mind, new things that need to be taken care of, hard time working on hot summer days... Now I just wish everything can be done ASAP and no more wedding after this, ever!!! To Ethan, thank you for driving that much to different places on Monday so that we can make a lot of progress!

 

Lord, make me trust your provision and grace.

Coming back from the retreat I felt I learned a lot, and recognized some missing piecese in my life. God is always good. He knocked on my heart and showed me how insufficiently I did in my spiritual life for the past month. I pray everyday but as the exam is approaching, I didn;t really spend enough quite time between me and my God by reading his Word and pray for his knowledge. I noticed that my prayer become dull, and less peace in heart. Because I wasn't absorbing his wisdom from the written words constently. I didn't invite God to speak to me through his words. I felt empty. I need to change.

 

Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed-- not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence -- continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose. (Philippians 2:12-13)

 

But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ -- the righteousness that comes from God and is by faith. (Philippians 3:7-9)

 

"He makes me lie down in green pasture, he leads me beside the still waters, he restores my soul." (Psalm 23:2-3)

I thank God for using His people to speak to me. I thank God for directing me and justify me consistently in my life. I thank God for the love from other parts of the same body- Lord's people, the unity and the fellowship. Jesus Christ should be my first thing, and the first thing. Any second things- family, marriage, career, finance... will fall into the right place if I build up stronger relationship with Him, do according to his will and glorify Him. Trust in the Lord who is our Almighty God and nothing is impossible in Him.

 

For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) and find out what pleases the Lord. Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. For it is shameful even to mention what the disobedientdo in secret. But everything exposesed by the light becomes visible, for it is light that makes everything visible. This is why it is said:" Wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you." Be very careful, then, how you live--not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord's will is. Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit. Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. (Ephesians5: 8-20)

 

"Now then, my sons, listen to me; blessed are those who keep my ways. Listen to my instruction and be wise; do not ignore it. Blessed is the man who listens to me, watching daily at my doors, waiting at my doorway. For whoever finds me finds life and receives favor from the LORD. But whoever fails to find me harms himself; all who hate me love death." (Proverbs 8: 32-36)

刚才收到大学友人从德国寄来的明信片。想起和这位当年外语学院院花的友谊历历在目。看着明信片上暖暖的祝福，落款是两个多月前，心里一下好温暖，这份祝福从地球的另一边辗转两个月送到我的门口。

说来还真是巧了，刚才从厨房走出来准备继续埋头看书，因为一个人住警惕性很高，发现门口下的亮光不对，像是有东西放在门口，从门镜上看，没人，想大概是传单，一开门，一张美丽的明信片安静的躺在地上。呵呵，开心。因为我是有邮箱的，信不应该是躺在我的公寓门口的，一定是邮递员把信投错了门牌号，楼里住户拿到了看到上面的祝福外加一些不懂的中文，便好心的给我送到门口了。

人在临时抱佛脚的忙乱中最容易被别人的关心感动，不是吗？上周末Ethan同学在我八点多晚饭还没着落时，不一会突然上访，送来了帮我烤的蛋糕面包，够我这一个礼拜吃的了。没错，给我做好吃的是我的爱情物语，哈哈！

还有为Gloria去台湾送别的晚上，这位一年后才能再见的姐妹提前送上了别致的结婚礼物，感动得眼泪一把把流。再想到月底又要启程去罗马尼亚的Noelle，下次回来可能又要一两年后。结婚之后又要离开Salt去新的团契，一桩桩的变化接踵而来。。。

Anyway,看书去了。谢谢一路上那么多的好朋友，有时候挺难过，一路走来都是在不断的变换地点，流失朋友。但是我相信有一天聚在一起，一定立马回到从前！我爱你们！

 

Here I want to share a song---Tis So Sweet to Trust in Jesus. I hope many of you who hear this song will feel the same thing.

Happy Mother's Day to all mothers! Our church had a special service today for Mother's day. I still remember I took Mom to church for the first time last mother's day and time flies so fast. I saw myself as Mom's little girl until one day all of sudden I think I should become Mom's big girl since I'm going to have my own family in several months. Growing up we all took motherhood for granted sometimes and she is always the person who ended up silent and said "you will understand me when you grow up". Unfortunately these circumstances happened a lot to me in certain periods of my life. Sorry Mom, it's me that made you worried time to time and I didn't know how much you have on your shoulder... I compared myself with you and found out sadly that I don't know whether I can be a better mom than you, a strong woman with consistent contribution and sacrifice to your own family providing the best environment possible to her child no matter how tough things turn out to be. God is amazing that He blessed a woman with her child and prepared her to be the least selfish person in the world to this little one coming out of her own body and influence the child with all her life, spiritually and intellectually. I can't be whom I am without you and it is my incredible honor to have you as my Mom. Thank you, Mom! I love you.  

从大学就喜欢看康熙来了，喜欢小S的泼辣诙谐，康永勇敢的本我主义。最近一段时间经常吃饭时间拿康熙来了当娱乐节目，边吃晚饭边看一期节目，仍然像以前一样经常会哈哈大笑，可多半节目内容也只是八卦搞笑，经常会觉得自己在浪费时间，却又还是笑着看着鄙视着自己低俗再继续笑着看着。在这里，感叹一下人的软弱。一直觉得演艺圈充满一系列的不堪忍受之辈分规则，道德水准低，拜金主义到处可见，偶像没有好的模范作用，圈子比沉沦的社会还要黑暗还要沉沦。于是乎，除了几个令我倍感尊敬的人以外，对艺人二字我从来没有羡慕之感。直到晚上看了一期节目知道台湾歌手刘畊宏成为基督徒后禁欲几年终于建立基督家庭，让我有了新的想法。惊讶的不是身处演艺圈的他能够禁欲几年，相反这正是上帝给与基督徒的自制和约束能力，是来自上帝的力量。不一样的是，我突然发现演艺圈也是社会的一部分，也会有各色分类，凡事依靠上帝他的大能会保护我们，让我们远离诱惑。当然这只是仰赖耶稣的行为准则中的一个方面，但是一切归于主的荣耀，让基督徒在看似乌烟瘴气的环境中做上帝的见证，荣耀主。一年前就不经意在网上看到了蔡少芬的信主见证，非常感人，上帝的大爱和大能再次得到活生生的印证。今天索性google了一下演艺圈基督徒明星，看到的名单时有一种确感如此的感觉。不是说把人分类对号入座，而是从一个人的德行可以依稀可见他的准则。人无完人，却可明白真理，可带着悔改和感恩的心，朝完善的行事准则--圣经，努力。上帝可以改变人性，改变人生，上帝的带领非常奇妙。

 

很敬佩能够凡事仍然仰望主荣耀主的基督徒艺人，在基督里我们是一家人。愿上帝给与他们力量与信心，活出耶稣基督的模样，在演艺圈带着信心为上帝做见证。阿门！

 

For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a sirit of power, of love and of self-dicipline. (2 Timothy 1:7)

not by works, so that no one can boast. (Ephesians 2:9)

For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. (Ephesians 2:10)

 

下面说到自己，已经斗争好久了，只在乎康熙来了的好笑，却忽略了更有意义的事去做，该做出行动了。在这里记一笔，警醒自己。

 

I found out last night that I passed the first cpa exam I took on Feb. A big relief. But still have three more to go. I definitely need to pray for Lord's provision of strength and time efficiency to prepare for the second one while many other things are going on at the same time. But I'm still looking forward to the retreat in May. Pastor Butler will be the speaker. Yay! This will be my last retreat with Salt, so I will definitely go even it's the week before my second exam...lol.

The process of wedding plan makes me feel stressed, excited, nervous and tired. It's a challenge to do a DIY wedding, but it feels good to work on my own wedding. I just wish I can have enough energy after long day everyday and open my cpa text book again...

 

一直跟Ethan一致地说婚礼要简单，越简单越好，很怕婚礼当天新娘新郎被累得晕头转向。于是我们将在教堂举行小型简单的婚礼。非常开心能跟他在我们自己的教堂举行婚礼，让我们自己团契的牧师主持。日子定了，其他周六都订满了，只剩八月的一天和九月的一天。考虑到九月份都开学了不方便，于是定了八月八号，星期六，巧了。本以为自己属于理智型的，还是会像往常一样好好边读书边赚钱糊口顺便准备下婚礼。最近发现非常没有办法专心读书。婚纱，礼花，蛋糕，装饰……Ethan说从来都是女生准备婚礼的精力比男生旺盛。以前觉得不相信，曾一度幻想大概给个理念让他去执行就行了……现在发现只要在家里看书就一定会网上google来google去。要简单，简单，简单，嗯。

婚前辅导课非常好，第一次这样系统的听牧师依照圣经说基督家庭各各方面的持家理念。夫妻，子女，挫折，财政，家务。。。很多时候我们自以为很聪明的做法往往并不是上帝所喜悦的，很多时候我们自认为很伟大的牺牲也并不是上帝所鼓励的。相反别人眼里过于宽容的做法却会在上帝那里得到奖赏，别人认为不值得的事情会在最终证明是明智的投资。在AZ的时候就很羡慕一对对有所耳闻的模范夫妻。努力着。